This pleases me because I rarely see any mention of how my disability might affect ordinary health care decisions.  I know that CP affects my digestion, breathing, and my gynecological health as well as my mobility and my muscle tone.  It’s good to see the CDC recognize that in a General Health publication.

But you know, “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.”

It actually began a little before Lent. At first I blamed it on the new mattress; I was just sleeping wrong. That’s what was causing the pain in my neck, the tingles in my hands. But the tingles became pain, and tingles started in new places. After a couple of weeks, I screwed up my courage and spoke to my rehab doctor. He ordered a diagnostic test called an EMG. The test was scheduled for Friday, Feb. 29, the third Friday in Lent. That turned out to be very appropriate.

One of the dubious blessings of being a librarian is that I know how to go to Medline Plus to research any medical condition, test, or test result my doctors tell me about. So I found out that an EMG involved electrodes and needles. Oh, boy.

I went in on Friday morning with a metal-free bra and my deodorant in my purse. I took off my crucifix while waiting, but didn’t think about taking off my wedding band (or I would have left it at home). I don’t usually remove it, so taking it off and putting it on the exam room counter gave me a little extra feeling that things were wrong.

The doctor who administered the test was very nice and explained each step. She applied conducting gel to my arm and “zapped” areas on my arms and hands with a little device, and made pen marks on me in various places, measuring here and there. The article I had read didn’t mention a topical shock, so I cheerfully jumped to the conclusion that the needles had been replaced by this little device.

Not so.

Nest came the needles. Electrified needles. She would poke me in an ink mark, and then turn on a current and ask me to move my hand, arm, or wrist in a given direction. Which hurt. The doctor told me that I could stop the test at any time if the pain was too much, and because I could, I didn’t have to.

“If you can sue this pain for good, God, please take it,” I thought, when it wasn’t too bad. When it got worse and my thoughts were less articulate, I just blew out a long breath and prayed in my head, “For the Holy Souls,” and, “Help.”

You know it’s bad when the doctor apologizes. All in all, the shocking, poking, marking and zapping took between an hour and an ninety minutes.

Tomorrow it’s off to the doctor to get an interpretation of the results, and to begin a plan of action. Having read the excellent book The Gift of Pain by Dt. Paul Brand and Philip Yancey, I know that it’s good that I have this pain, that I’m being warned that my body is damaged, and I need to change things.  I know, too, that a little fasting from computer fun (less Chuzzle, more reading) is good as a Lenten discipline. Still… this is a challenge. Trusting that this is being permitted by a God who loves me more than I can imagine is a tougher sell.

This seems to be a common problem for both people who work in libraries and for people who have been using wheelchairs for most or all of their lives.

Prayers for wisdom, willingness to change, and healing are all welcome.

In Need of Your Help

We release this emergency request on behalf of Geraldine Hayes, a patient in Volusia County in Florida.

Geraldine has been in the hospital since August 2007. Her family has been working feverishly for months to get her transferred to another hospital.

We are hoping this alert will find an attorney who can help Geraldine to obtain a transfer to another medical facility.

Please – this is an emergency request. If you or someone you know is a practicing attorney in the state of Florida and can help Geraldine and her family, contact Terri’s Foundation at: info@terrisfight.org or call (727) 490-7603.

Am I glad to see pro-life action on campus? Yes. Respectful discussion taking place? Wonderful. I don’t even mind the little knots of NOW/NARAL protesters on both sides of the large display. They, again, are respectful, and have every right to be there. And everyone is keeping the sidewalks relatively clear around the display, which is nice for us people on wheels.

But… I have a hard time with the pictures of dead babies. Billboard-sized pictures.  It doesn’t seem to me that helps in bringing the discussion up to spiritual principles. It’s working on the literally visceral level. Is that where the matter belongs? I don’t know what to think, because we need to recognize the evil inherent in abortion, and yet it seems to me that the photos encourage the dehumanization they seek to protest.

So, you three or so people reading, what about it? Do graphic photos advance the pro-life cause? Cloud it? Discuss.

Oct. 1, 2007

To faculty, students and staff:

I’d like to take this opportunity to let you know what measures we are taking to ensure the University of Florida remains a civil and secure environment to host events of all kinds on our campus.

In order to allow ample time for changing policies or protocols in light of the incident following Sen. John Kerry’s town hall forum two weeks ago, I have asked the ACCENT Speaker’s Bureau to reschedule the Oct. 11 appearance of Dr. Jack Kevorkian to a later date this academic year.

The event, and a subsequent panel discussion on assisted suicide by several faculty members in law, medicine and philosophy, now will be held at 8 p.m. on January 15 in the Stephen C. O’Connell Center.

The decision was not an easy one. It was made only after much thought and consultation with the University Police Department, Student Affairs, Student Government and members of ACCENT.

It is our responsibility as an academic institution to provide a safe environment where everyone feels free to express their views, no matter what they are. Like other universities, UF is a special place where free expression and the lively exchange of ideas remain vital to our educational mission.

Speakers appearing on our campus in recent years have spoken against the death penalty, pleaded their innocence in steroid scandals and criticized leaders in opposing political parties. They have been presidents, entertainers, industry icons, sports heroes and the like.

I remain committed to welcoming these kinds of speakers as part of the campus dialogue.

Meanwhile, we are awaiting the results of an independent review by the Florida Department of Law Enforcement of the events that led to the arrest of one of our students two weeks ago. As I have said before, they have our full cooperation and we want them to have every opportunity to conduct a thorough investigation.

Also we plan to announce this week the formation of a nine-member task force consisting of students and faculty to review police protocols and our events management practices. The group will be charged with developing a series of recommendations for the university. Former Faculty Senate President Kim Tanzer has agreed to chair this task force.

On none of these actions have we requested or set any deadlines. While we all would like to see these matters resolved sooner rather than later, I believe we should allow adequate time to make any policy or protocol changes needed to ensure a safe and civil environment for full, free, diverse and lively discourse.

I will continue to provide updates on our progress at www.president.ufl.edu.

Sincerely,

J. Bernard Machen

President

University of Florida

——————

I will be writing President Machen to ask him to ensure that people with disabilities will be represented on that panel. Please continue to pray.

I do not think it is in any way an accident that this announcement was made on the feast day of Saint Therese of Lisieux, who during her painful final illness, was haunted by temptations to end her life,

Thank you for the roses, St. Therese.

ACCENT Speech Bureau
300-1 JWRU, Room 306
P.O. Box 118505
Gainesville, FL 32611-8505
Tel: 352-392-1665 ext. 306
Fax: 352-392-8072
Website: http://www.sg.ufl.edu/accent
Email: accent@sg.ufl.edu
Press/Upcoming Show Information: 352-392-1665 ext. 411

J. Bernard Machen
President of University of Florida
president@ufl.edu

Go for it.

As she is trying to decide what course to take, her uncle Mordecai comes to her with this warning:*

For if you keep silence at such a time as this, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another quarter; but you and your father’s house will perish. And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?

From the time that I first heard this story I I have known my time to speak has come. At the time in my career when I most need to keep my nose to the grindstone and make no enemies, to please the powerful (or at least not aggravate them), here is a great evil coming to my adopted hometown, to my workplace.

Now the most cursory investigation will blow my psuedonymity right up, cause you can guess there aren’t many Catholic librarians in scooters tootling around UF. But who knows whether I have not come to Gainesville for such a time as this? So I tell you now — I’m GOING to be at the place where Kevorkian is speaking. I’m GOING to fight this evil.

And I’ll post my plans here. Come and join me.

Additional links:
Keep Dr. Death Away from our Campuses — Blogs for Terri
Schiavo brother heads effort to stop Kevorkian event at University of Florida — Catholic News Agency
Dr. Death — Inn at the End of the World
Dr. Death and the U of Florida — Annunciations
Blogs for Terri has Petition to stop Dr. Death from spreading his lies — Causa Nostrae Laetitiae
University of Florida: Yes to Death! — Thrown Back

*Scripture: Esther 4:14, Revised Standard Version, Second Catholic Edition (Ignatius Press, 2002)

The Terri Schindler Schiavo Foundation has an online petition you can sign to protest his appearance, which will be paid for with $50,000 of (mandatory) student fees.

The University administration has defended the selection as “promoting dialogue.”

Well, let’s give them dialogue. Let’s provide UF with the clear message that people who are “freely choosing” suicide when they are suffering from poor pain control and inadequate resources for personal care and independent living are NOT making a free choice.

UF has a large Catholic community (which happens to include the coaches of those championship men’s sports programs you might have heard about, by the way), and that community needs to mobilize. C’mon, y’all. Let’s unmask “death with dignity” and show it for what it is: “death for the convenience of others.”

Many disability activists were appalled to discover details about the medically-approved surgical mutilation of Ashley X, a Seattle-area girl with severe disabilities. Her parents (and many supporters) argued that the drastic measures were necessary, and that Ashley would never have the cognitive abilities to understand what she had lost. This article from Mercator.net by Anne McDonald shows that assessment of Ashley’s condition may be tragically wrong.

Thanks to the Curt Jester for the link.